Time, Big Sur, Foot...Soliloquy?

Where have I been? What have I been doing? These are questions I don't ask of you, but of myself. I've noticed that time has been on fast forward recently and that is never more apparent than in my journal. I crack the delicate pages and turn to the last entry to find that not days, but weeks have drifted by while I don't take note of it any more than I take note of a light fog passing through these mountains.

Then I am in the fog myself...caught up in what is going on and suddenly weary at the thought of fighting my way to a wireless spot to get some personal computer time. At this moment the fog has cleared. Recent events have cleared it. Recent events, like a sudden blast of sun that burns off the fog, have given me a glimpse of blue skies that tell me where I am. I don't know how long it will last, so I'm here to quickly survey my surroundings.

Two weekends ago I went down to Big Sur and camped. One night. Two friends. Much needed and appreciated time away from life at Mount Hermon.


We got a chance to sit out and enjoy just sitting in the sun. Some look like they are actually relaxing, while others look like a dead body tossed aside in the woods. You decide which is which...



It is amazing to me that Mount Hermon can be such a great place, yet is still a place that I feel I need a break from on a fairly consistent basis. So far I'm chalking that up to it being an intense place. When I am there, by entire life is there. Life there is constantly and consistently on my mind. Some of those things I don't mind at all. Other things, like the details of my job and if I'm supposed to be somewhere and don't know it, are a nuisance. Mount Hermon is a place where God's work is being done, and I admire that to a great degree. At the same time, I listen to speakers, unable to stop myself from being critical at times. I suppose it is something similar to going to a great church, but not connecting with the pastor; they do God's work, but some things just don't line up for you like they should. There comes a time when you have to decide how critical those issues are. Am I at that point?
................
Last week was a great group of college students. It is amazing how this position can exhaust me, and yet the people can bring me back to life. It also helps when the week goes according to plan. It helps when a group gels. It helps when I don't get sleep for good reasons. It helps when I'm questioning some things in my life. It helps that I don't feel helpless in that questioning period.

And now this week is at full tilt. Back in the swing of things. Of course, Monday now affords not only the thrill of the Boardwalk, but also the thrill of tracking down our favorite Boardwalk employee, Brandon. Think I'm kidding? We've been taking pictures each week:


Then, Tuesday morning I went running. Trail running. I've been doing a lot of that here. For those that don't know, I run as often as I can. Running is therapeutic for me in a way that only runners understand. I think, sometimes, about whether or not running gets past the initial pain one experiences when being out of shape. Does the pain go away as your body gets used to the activity? Or do you just get used to pain...accept it? Probably a little of both. Probably has to do with life that way. Some things you deal with, and they are no longer painful, while other events are always painful, but you just accept it. And, every now and then, you get hurt. That's what made yesterday different.



Later, as it really began to blossom, the bruising patterns changed to reveal what it would settle into for the time being:


So now I'm taking a few Ibuprofins a day. And by a few I mean 12. A day. One dozen per day.

So it goes. It happens. I plan to run again in the near future. I plan to test my ankle. I plan to push it. I expect to struggle with it.

While sitting around last night, with my ankle up on a pillow, elevating it (only because someone told me to), I had some time to think about the situation. I get scrapes a lot, but very rarely does something happen that keeps me off my feet (or foot, as it were). I am determined to get back to running in the near future. Not only that, but I want to specifically hit the trails in the near future. Something about getting right back on the horse as soon as I can.

That very desire is something I'm not going to say I do very often. There was a time when, after falling off the horse, I was very content to stay off. I don't think many people would say that of me, but I would manage to stay off the horse in subtle ways. So, it is fun for me to look at this as a definitive personality shift, or at least the start of one.

There are some amazing things going on in my life, not all of which I care to share here. Just know that each week brings something new. Each week also develops other, ongoing events. Significance, at the moment, is the primer for my life.